Saturday, November 27, 2010

It's Better to Burn Out Than Fade Away

Burn Out - defined as: blow out: melt, break, or become otherwise unusable according to Google.

So maybe I have yet to melt, I've only had a minor mental breakdown and I'm not quite unusable YET, but I'm feeling pretty close. I can't even believe how incredibly lucky I've been to have had to opportunities I have had in the past year.

This time last year I was finishing up my Internship application and felt like throwing up every time I even thought about the interviews for internship and learning who was accepted and who wasn't. Not only did I get to intern all summer, but I got to do half of it in Kenya. I wouldn't trade these experiences for the world, but I have to admit, after a year packed with cool stuff and not a lot of time off in between them all, I am POOPED! It doesn't help that I always have a million things on the go which really means no down time ever, which of course is completely self-inflicted. Every semester I tell myself and anyone who will listen to me that it will be different, I'll be different, but it never is. I get bored to easily to not be doing something all the time.

I normally love school. I wouldn't switch programs if you paid me to, and I really loved my placements which I am hoping translates into eventually loving my job. But at this point in time, I don't even care about school. I don't want to do assignments, I can't be bothered to start studying for exams and I have absolutely zero motivation for anything. My brain had gone kaput and is rebelling against work of any kind.

So instead of working on the millions of things that I should have been working on today, my day ended up like this:

8am: 1 hour spin class
9am: Green Tea and a Newspaper at Starbucks
10am: 1 hour hot yoga class
11:30am: Farmers Market with Jess
12:30pm: Sushi lunch date with Jess
2:15pm: 2 for 1 double Americanos at Timothy's
3:40pm: Cooking pork tenderloin marinated in an orange/dijon mustard/ honey concoction
5pm: Walk to work through the Santa Clause Parade, work until 9.
9pm: Movie with the girls

That counts as productive right?

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